Good day friends,
I thought that today I would blog briefly because this space has been so sorely neglected! Not much has changed in my world, the earth keeps spinning and I keep loving leather! I feel like I say so much on Twitter these days that maybe there is not much I can say on this space. But 140 characters only allows you to say a lot with so little, therefore you have to be savvy with your words. I think over the last few years, I am beginning to approach that level of savvy required for a tweeter to be effective but I have so much farther to go!
Since I last blogged, my social media has expanded, contracted, expanded and contracted again. I think the last last downsize my be temporary for a while. I need a new phone and I am trying to figure out how that may happen. But Twitter is still @buspimp (main account) and @thepervertpope (back-up). My tumblr is still up, not as active on it but you can check out all that i'm perving over. 'm also on Instagram as Buspimp. Fetlife is still the same, feel free to add me there as well as my other social media. It would be nice to interact with those who are reading my blog for the first time as well as reconnect with old friends. Social media is a double edged sword, as it shows us the best we can be as it can show us when we are not at our best. But the part that is the most fun is reaching out the others who are likeminded, those who are genuinely interested in BDSM and those who are BDSM and kink-friendly. I have a great combination of followers on Twitter and I am so thankful for all of you. You have given me a voice and I thank you so much!
In my interactions with dominants and subs, I see so much that is good in BDSM. So many of you are very happy in your role whatever that may be. But where there is good, there is of course there is not so good (I hate using bad here) and I think I spend about 50% of my time trying to tweet out what could be better as many subs attempt to find their way on their journey. When you aren't knowledgeable about something and you make a decent attempt, you will make mistakes. Even those of us like myself who understand protocol and respect, I still make a mistake from time to time. But, if the error is small and unintentional, the correction will be slight and it will help you along the way. But what I am seeing more of is folks being flagrant, demanding and irresponsible and the response to that is outright rejection. When this happens, there are hurt feelings, anger and lashing out which leads to more rejection.
Being new to submission is a great feeling. It can be liberating but the good feeling can overtake you, cloud your judgement and allow one to make mistakes. The former scenario I mentioned is when one is guided by their true submissive feelings, they recognize that approaching a dominant is about protocol and respect and they do the right thing with a few small errors that are easily corrected. The latter is when one thinks with their sexual feelings, their kinks, fetishes and want to get off, thus they approach a dominant with disrespect. I always say on twitter that you "have to do your homework" when it comes to finding a dominant that matches well with you. The match initially about interests, the level of submission you desire and most importantly what you bring to the dominant that will best serve their needs. Twenty years ago, the disrespect would still not be tolerated, but learning about protocol and what a dominant desires from a submissive was not as easy. Today, it's as easy as a few keystrokes on dem innanets and then taking the time to READ the information. Just because you visited the site doesn't mean you have a right to ask questions about things that have been clearly stated on the dominant's website.
So take the time to investigate your feelings, research dominants carefully, read the information and know what they expect and require of you and then with respect approach via email or social media if that is ok. Sometimes it's best to take your time as you do these things to allow the submissive feelings to speak for you as opposed to the kink and fetish that you want to explore. In your approach, if you keep your message short and direct (direct in the sense of making a respectful inquiry), you may avoid saying something that can be misconstrued as disrespect or ignorance. Write a message that your submissive voice can be heard and that dominant can feel your desire for service in your words. This is only the first few steps in a journey and one doesn't want to stumble, fall and hurt their chances of living out their best submissive life.
I thought that today I would blog briefly because this space has been so sorely neglected! Not much has changed in my world, the earth keeps spinning and I keep loving leather! I feel like I say so much on Twitter these days that maybe there is not much I can say on this space. But 140 characters only allows you to say a lot with so little, therefore you have to be savvy with your words. I think over the last few years, I am beginning to approach that level of savvy required for a tweeter to be effective but I have so much farther to go!
Since I last blogged, my social media has expanded, contracted, expanded and contracted again. I think the last last downsize my be temporary for a while. I need a new phone and I am trying to figure out how that may happen. But Twitter is still @buspimp (main account) and @thepervertpope (back-up). My tumblr is still up, not as active on it but you can check out all that i'm perving over. 'm also on Instagram as Buspimp. Fetlife is still the same, feel free to add me there as well as my other social media. It would be nice to interact with those who are reading my blog for the first time as well as reconnect with old friends. Social media is a double edged sword, as it shows us the best we can be as it can show us when we are not at our best. But the part that is the most fun is reaching out the others who are likeminded, those who are genuinely interested in BDSM and those who are BDSM and kink-friendly. I have a great combination of followers on Twitter and I am so thankful for all of you. You have given me a voice and I thank you so much!
In my interactions with dominants and subs, I see so much that is good in BDSM. So many of you are very happy in your role whatever that may be. But where there is good, there is of course there is not so good (I hate using bad here) and I think I spend about 50% of my time trying to tweet out what could be better as many subs attempt to find their way on their journey. When you aren't knowledgeable about something and you make a decent attempt, you will make mistakes. Even those of us like myself who understand protocol and respect, I still make a mistake from time to time. But, if the error is small and unintentional, the correction will be slight and it will help you along the way. But what I am seeing more of is folks being flagrant, demanding and irresponsible and the response to that is outright rejection. When this happens, there are hurt feelings, anger and lashing out which leads to more rejection.
Being new to submission is a great feeling. It can be liberating but the good feeling can overtake you, cloud your judgement and allow one to make mistakes. The former scenario I mentioned is when one is guided by their true submissive feelings, they recognize that approaching a dominant is about protocol and respect and they do the right thing with a few small errors that are easily corrected. The latter is when one thinks with their sexual feelings, their kinks, fetishes and want to get off, thus they approach a dominant with disrespect. I always say on twitter that you "have to do your homework" when it comes to finding a dominant that matches well with you. The match initially about interests, the level of submission you desire and most importantly what you bring to the dominant that will best serve their needs. Twenty years ago, the disrespect would still not be tolerated, but learning about protocol and what a dominant desires from a submissive was not as easy. Today, it's as easy as a few keystrokes on dem innanets and then taking the time to READ the information. Just because you visited the site doesn't mean you have a right to ask questions about things that have been clearly stated on the dominant's website.
So take the time to investigate your feelings, research dominants carefully, read the information and know what they expect and require of you and then with respect approach via email or social media if that is ok. Sometimes it's best to take your time as you do these things to allow the submissive feelings to speak for you as opposed to the kink and fetish that you want to explore. In your approach, if you keep your message short and direct (direct in the sense of making a respectful inquiry), you may avoid saying something that can be misconstrued as disrespect or ignorance. Write a message that your submissive voice can be heard and that dominant can feel your desire for service in your words. This is only the first few steps in a journey and one doesn't want to stumble, fall and hurt their chances of living out their best submissive life.
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